Tuesday's Child

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Location: Aotearoa, New Zealand

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

(filmed inside a) garage rock (indie pop)

Nik & Bevan are Over The Atlantic and currently they are over the Atlantic, doing a mad 25 date tour of the States. I have one of the gorgeous posters from their farewell gig, which i bought for ten bucks to help fundraise. Nik autographed it for me like the superstar he is and thanked me for my contribution, as it would gratefully go towards an inflight meal. Bless.

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Monday, October 30, 2006

Judging on appearances

Steph has blogged about scandalous interaction with some guy (with a gorgeous Welsh accent... le sigh) she met at a bar. (Over there in London, where she is now located. Wench).

You can read the full story over on her MySpace page but in summary, things could have progressed deliciously further, had she not noticed at the crucial moment exactly what he was wearing. Which was... a tee-shirt featuring two unicorns engaged in the special act that usually takes place - well, not exactly behind closed doors, but at least behind a thick clump of magical forest.

Steph said 'thanks but no thanks' taking this satorial choice as a wider reflection of personality and general demeanor, stating "there are so many good clothes shops in London too, so many well dressed men, and I rope in that Hideous Welsh Unicorn shagging picture covered man. Yikes.".

While a part of me is thrilled that finding a decent bloke is proving just as difficult on the other side of the world as anywhere here in the South Pacific (being the bitter twisted spinster that I am), I also commiserate with her that the dim lighting and a whiff of alcohol can lead to occasional lapses of judgement.

My own story along these lines harks back to - wait for it - 1st year uni. GOSH WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT. It was once of those classic eyes-across-a-crowded-room moments. Except in this case it was a eyes-across-a-sweaty-dancefloor moment, but details people details. You see someone looking at you and you know they're not looking at the person behind you, even though there's such intensity and familarity in those eyes and surely they're a stranger? Oh yeah, we're talking full on cheese here.

Next thing you know we're right next to each other, wrangling things amongst the circles of friends we've been dancing in and then, well, then everyone hates you because you're one of those couples on the dancefloor who start doing the touchy-feely thing... moving in close, brushing against one another, looking at eachother... and once the kissing starts... well, lordy - fortunately you're usually so into it you can't hear all the retching noises your mates are making behind your back, or just over your instant-soul-mate's shoulder. Just as well you have your eyes closed because they are rolling their eyes and backing away to a spot where they don't have to watch your arse being groped by a complete stranger that you will no doubt bore them with tales about for the next fortnight.

In this instance, me and the aforementioned snoggee, Regan, swiftly escaped out to the garden bar to avoid a lynching for our brutal PDA. I guess i kind of noticed that he was holding his drink awkwardly, at direct mid-chest level, but didn't think much of it. However, it soon became apparent he was wearing the world's most atrocious tee-shirt. Steph, honey, I think this one stomps all over yours. Regan's one had a wee picture of a devil on it and it also said "HORNY". Oh yes, in capital letters, just like that. And the devil had horns.

Get it?
Horns? Horny? ...But then - the other meaning of horny? the naughty meaning!!

Oh the hilarity.

I believe I was so desperate to get away when I realised this was the piece of cloth adorning his gorgeous self, that I attempted to bolt and was too hasty in unfolding my legs from under the picnic table and nearly stacked it - which gave him time to explain that the tee-shirt was a standard item within his group of friends. In that they had some drinking game and if you lost the round of it or something, you were forced to wear the tee-shirt to town in order to shame you. I assured him that it was certainly effective in that respect.

Long story short: verified this with his mates, saw others of them miserably wearing it on other occasions, you kinda have to give them props for being so committed to the concept. Fact of the matter is Regan was the hottest guy I ever met ever. Ever.

The other thing he wore, consistently, rather than just the once for losing a drunken game, was John Paul Gaultier 'Le Male' which is like love potion #9 to me and just makes me stupid in the head and I cannot resist it. It overrides any fashion faux pas as far as I'm concerned, It does terrible things to my judgement. I bought an unbelievably expensive pair of Wranglers the other week and I think it may solely be because the sales assistant was wearing JPG. I'm pretty sure I didn't pash him though so that's progress. Pretty sure. People usually get hickeys from trying on jeans, aye? Aye??


flatmates lost & lost

Yah. Um ok so. It seems that at some time between 2.30pm (when Simon left to stock up on post-exam snacks) and approximately 4.30pm (when Cam arrived home from law school), Emily packed up all of her shit and moved out.

So there's that.

Apparently the room didn't really work for her after all and we just weren't the right flat for her.

Well - yeah - 'cause we're not the right flat ...FOR A CRAZY PERSON!!

Look, ok, sorry - I'm just feeling a little bit confused and hurt and betrayed and like I'm never gonna trust somebody from Nebraska EVER AGAIN IN MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE!!

Saturday, October 28, 2006

flatmates lost & found

Apparently the opportunity to get paid to play music on a cruise ship in the Caribbean is just too tempting. Hayden moves out today and is going to Miami... (brief pause while Bel has late 90s Will Smith pop bounce around her head). Its all happened very quickly - I mean, Hayd's a muso, so when he started saying "I'm looking at getting a job on a cruise ship" we took it about as seriously as "Yes I'm sure I dropped those back at Amalgamated Video and not at the public library".

But next thing ya know, the world clock's being consulted for phone calls with the Northern hemisphere, the audition went swimmingly, and the boy is packing his bags. Our flat has felt so settled since Simon moved in, things run pretty smoothly & the fact that we have a pair of brothers here brings an interesting twist to house relations. I love living in a boy flat and all that that entails. Simon and I take turns at being the biggest slob - tho he is prone to cleaning blitzes, whereas my "floordrobe" is pretty much a permanent institution.

However, first rule that Cam slapped down in the hunt for a new flattie was that it be a girl. (Basically so he'd have someone to talk to about all that gay stuff he's into, like the environment and shit). We'd consider a guy if need be, but when everyone's favourite of the applicants was a German fellow... well, those who know me know my feelings about Germans, so that was vetoed quick smart.

Usual story - my gut feeling was Emily, the American photojournalist recently arrived in Wellies, was the one for us. We asked her to come back for a second visit, just to confirm things. Our flat is quite a homely place, not a train station where everyone eats in their room and ignores each other in the street, so we wanted to make the right decision. I was a little late due to work, but Simon was feeling the same way as me and Cam, and Hayden had already invited her to his farewell party that night, sooo... I guess that means welcome to the family!! You poor wee dot.

Overheard In My Lounge

Friend: Name your all-time favourite Wellington band
Flatmate: Um... um...
Friend: Mine's Fur Patrol
Flatmate: The Black Seeds

[Momentary silence]

Neither can keep a straight face any longer and proceed to fall about laughing.

--Dining table chair & Bay window seat

Overheard by: ARBHM

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

long weekend away

more details to follow soon
in the meantime, sneak preview over on Tanya's flickr

P1020165.JPG, originally uploaded by tanyapants.


Thursday, October 19, 2006

Dean Young poem: He Said Turn Here

He Said Turn Here

and then Tony showed us the lake
where he had thrown some of his sadness last summer
and it had dissolved like powder
so he thought maybe the lake could take
some of the radiant, aluminum kind
he had been making lately.
And it did.
It was a perfect lake,
none of the paint had chipped off,
no bolts showing, the arms that Dante
and Virgil would have to hack through
not even breaking the surface.
Mumbling Italian to itself,
it had climbed down two wooden stairs
back to the beach now that the rains were done.
How strange to be water so close to the ocean
yet the only other water you get to talk to
comes from the sky. Maybe this is why
it seems so willing to take on
Tony's sadness which sometimes corrodes
his friends, which is really
many different sadnesses, smaller
and smaller, surrounded by more
and more space, each a world and
at its core an engine like a bee
inside a lily, like buzzing inside
the bee. It seems like nothing
could change its color although
we couldn't tell what color it was,
it kept changing. In the summer,
Tony says he comes down early each day
and there's no one around so the lake
barely says a thing when he dives in
and once when his kitchen was on fire in Maine
and he was asleep, the lake came and bit his hand,
trying to drag him to safety
and some nights in New Mexico,
he can hear it howling,
searching for him in the desert
so we're glad Tony has this lake
and we promise to come back in August
and swim with him across,
maybe even race.

Dean Young

Thanks to Dora Malech for introducing me to Dean's writing at this year's Iowa Workshop up at the IIML. She's going to be running the MA course in 2007 while Bill Manhire takes a break from teaching. We are literally going to be at the airport to welcome her back into the country.


further evidence of shenannigans

As if my textual encounter of the previous weekend wasn't enough, here are some visuals for you.
Apparently my phone has an exciting night mode which puts a moody blue cast upon all who fall under its gaze. Tres Veruca Salt.
Simon and I make that backseat look all kinds of fun.

I have actually mostly been insanely busy lately assisting with the editing of a poetry anthology. Entitled tiny gaps, it's going to be launched by the NZPS in mid-November. (See how confidently she said that? Not a tremor!) You see, things have gone a little haywire. Plan B has had to kick into gear. But it's gonna be oookaaay.

Things have been hectic at work lately too, lots of pressure on. I know that I am starting to make fret the people who know me, because I tend to cope suspiciously well in these kind of circumstances and then spin out completely.
But I have also learnt a lot from previous periods of my life. Learnt it the hard way though, sure.

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Sunday, October 15, 2006

i just got undressed [director's cut]

[Yeah... I woke up on Sunday morning with a new kind of hangover. Not only did I feel a bit seedy and most distinctly dehydrated, I also had the nagging feeling that I had, that I'd - what was it? Been caught clambering on top of a bench in my high heels pouring shots from the last of a bottle of Malibu we'd swiped from an upper liquor cabinet..? No. Well, yes - but something else, too. Oh right, that's it: I'd blogged while under the influence. I swiftly pulled the post, reeking of stale alcohol as it was, but now that I've had time to add this note, am putting it back up again, as a public health and safety warning, if nothing else.]

and a pick fell out of ym bra. Like a guitar pick. am habing trouble recalling this but must be fromthe Over The Atlanic gig!! woot:D man am so glad i have a boogie and catch up with Nik & meet bevan properly before they 'fly to the states' heh heh
This weekend has been workwork...fuckaround,,,workPARTYworkworkworkPARTY i am so strung out, it is like a wire, the tension in me-good and bad, its keepiong me going but also i Ma so scared of pushing it too far and paying the consequences.
I have muchos dos photos from last night and ALSO tongith - shall activate my cellular device and upload them here via gmail hmm yeah - You know every couple of months i go and hang out with the old Wangas boys and its pretty much a waste of both our timeses. I adore Brendan (Brendon...dammit...Mel & I discussed our uncertainty re his name's correct spelling - shitballs. One of those things where its been sooo longyou know?cuase its been, like, nine years. i suggested we split it down the middle and go Brenden hmm yeah? matches that way too.
Yeah anwyay, he;s a lovely guy and always makes an effort and Brett is damn funny (not to mention Spring Onion alumini) freakin smart arse shit. But honestly the rest of them, i have no idea where they're at or what they're up to orwhich nickname goes with who or why on earth --ooh i just deleted a super bitchy clothes/appearance realated comment there.

I am soused and i CANNOT freaken make the picteres get IN HERE and this should be going in my writy writing journal but i was typing some stuff and that got too much so i thought i'd chekc blogging thing anf then HULLO here i am and i cant get the photos in i think i need to use that Transer program hmm yeah.

it vexes me so! am transferring emotions to peopel that i barely know despite the fact we have moved in teh same social circles for years. But I need get to see Mr D Meyer,more than just see him, indeed, see him with my eyesmy two eyes in my head hmm yeah. I've seen him once this year for a fraction of a section and the last time before that was um,not not even at Christmas in Wangas or anything but at Brendeoan's end of last year - we both felt so out of place there and clung to one another. I was with Dan and was in the midst of warning him no tocome and Duncan insisted he meet him & it wound up being lovely. Good times. ooh- me and Dan- we held helds! in a post-modern couple, late relationship intimacy devemental stage kindof way bahahah :D Except with my appauling all-or-nothing its on or its ON instant connexion track record, that probably means it was like Day Four.

OHH i had another point (bahahah- just mde the effort to delete a typo,as opposed to all the others i've ignored YES i AM aware :P) "another pint"hehehee : ANYWAY: poetry reading: Monday 16th October: 8pm: Room 101, Bar Bodega
please come along - its just a couple of us, not a huge affair - part of a friend of Cam's final year design project - she's doing a multimedia thang with projected stills and spoken word.........and me reading new new work that has yet to be heard aloud and that i'm not entriely sure i'm capable of verbalising
shall be good time i'm sure. Cam's great anywya-and some of my Iowa girls will be there too, hurrah!

[Will add photos in upcoming post soon. Now that I am in more capable state.]


Friday, October 13, 2006

Straight to The Pool Room

I was the sticking point once, in a lecturer's rant on modern technology. He was talking about the transient nature of email, online chatting and text messages.
How all these forms of communication are lost into the ether, as opposed to the permanence of a preserved illuminated manuscript or carved stone tablet. But because I was the kind of student who did, I put up my hand.
And let him know that I always made an effort to write down and record any special, or memorable, or significant for whatever small random reason, or just plain damn funny texts I got.

This is a clearing out of the ones saved to The Pool Room folder from my old phone.

Some are talismans, and some are sad reminders. Some make me shake my head and smile in bemusement, some make me actually laugh out loud. Some are the only evidence of a person ever being in my life, some are a reference point of an ever-changing relationship. Some are a fragment, some just seem like it now.

They cover the last nine or so months of my life in a skewed kind of way. Perhaps it's a better representation than photographs or patchy diary entries or the memories retold into set-routine stories. I've cut out the senders and their number. You can fill in the blanks. Maybe you are the blanks.

P2of2: as Prism. Altho
that name sucks i
reckon, some kind of
hippy gaylord cross
breeding? So yeah, im
keeping it heathen this
morning. And missing
you- cam
Date: 22 Jan 2006
Time: 08.15.12

Well actually no, it
doesn't at all.
Date: 22 Jan 2006
Time: 11.09.18

Oh, that's OK. It works 4
me. Lucky. Just had to
check my diary. I might
of had a early dinner
date or jazzercise class
to take
Date: 26 Jan 2006
Time: 23.17.07

P1of1:I am reading
bukowski and he is
deranged yet living the
great writing life. It will
be a good life, i feel, to
write and grow old. It
will be good to hav
Date: 8 Feb 2006
Time: 11.28.13

P1of2:e you doing the
same. And of course, I
love you.
Date: 8 Feb 2006
Time: 11.28.19

We had th best time
seein you again, we will
def hav to make a trip
to welly soon. but u no
how hard it is 4 me 2
spend and not save! i'l
try to make it soon!
Date: 16 Apr 2006
Time: 21.31.28

Give our love to mela
and have th safest
journey back home, and
don't worry bout work,
if it sucks then do whats
best 4 u-if my mum can
do it u def can!
Date: 16 Apr 2006
Time: 21.33.08

I bet you made barnes day
and u gave him all ur
love. hope it went wel
wit brown and that ur
happy wit how it went.
man, how can u c so
many people in 6 days!
Date: 16 Apr 2006
Time: 21.37.08

it the eye of the tiger its
the thrill of the fight
rising up to the
challenge of our rival! : )
Date: 24 Apr 2006
Time: 16.51.07

Mauve and sky blue
checquers of course. To
set off my eyes. I'll be
the belle of the links
Date: 13 May 2006
Time: 22.10.48

Well there can't be 2 of
us. Fine,fine, I'll be the
beau(scuffs ground and
mutters under his
breath). Or we could
duel. How's your swing?
Date: 13 May 2006
Time: 22.26.40

My secret weapon! I was
planning to out frill out!
Even now I doubt even
the inimitable 'Meataxe'
can prepare you for the
frillification you have
in store
Date: 13 May 2006
Time: 22.41.35

Sweet merciful crap! I
hadn't considered the
hat! Maybe there's
another way we can
settle this?
Date: 13 May 2006
Time: 22.53.18

Golf it is. Clubs at dawn,
Date: 13 May 2006
Time: 23.00.50

Date: 29 Jun 2006
Time: 22.09.23

Ha! Colin-a guiding light
in this seething pit of
hedonism.c u
Date: 2 July 2006
Time: 02.30.05

He likes u and is not
afraid to show it. Now
deal with it, go out with
him again, and then
decide whether to go
forward or go cats. Says
Date: 5 July 2006
Time: 18.17.54

Date: 4 Aug 2006

Thanks bella you are
one choice lady. Peter x
Date: 5 Aug 2006
Time: 01.15.36

Date: 12 Aug 2006

Thus keeping your life
is perfect balance. Who
would've thought Ben
would have been the
guardian of great
Date: 16 Aug 2006
Time: 20.03.57

Ps. Honestly. I would he
anywhere. But i love
you.xxx honest like
Date: 18 Aug 2006
Time: 22.13.13

Hope you are having a
good night my dear and
that you don't have to
contend with mr.
Or, if you do bump into
him, it's repeatedly, in
the good way.
Date: 18 Aug 2006
Time: 22.16.34

Message confirmed and
feelings noted as
mutual. Nothing more to
Date: 12 Sept 2006
Time: 14.45.26

Such talent! To scuttle
and sip, a wellington
talent we all strive for!
Im back tuesday if you
can fit me into your
Date: 16 Sept 2006
Time: 11.53.26

Oh thats stink. I do love
a good curtain up walk
out. i live for it in fact .
Anyways back in welly
land now. My cat is
staring at me knowingly.
Date: 22 Sept 2006
Time: 00.19.17

PS: Yes have been reunited with darling former-full time cell phone. It appears to have been off hiding in some kind of huff at being replaced by thrilling clamshell model with two screens that I flick open and closed incessantly and use to display a series of photos of myself. I found it in my bed. A distant corner of my bed, but still. Shame.
Am yet to find time to get the directory transferred over though, so to the person who texted at 6am saying "Dont you think more people should be awake right now?" well, MISSION ACCOMPLISHED ...whoever you are... !! If I run out of energy before the Tropical Downbeat Orchestra make it onto the stage tonight, you're going get an irate phone call using the very last of my steam where I ask your name, including your middle ones, so I can give you a proper dressing down.

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

moderate-to-high-level cellphone related disaster

so i came home from work like a month ago and simon was like I saved you some jellybeans and I was like YUM! and then sat on his bed and watched him play madden for a while. then about a week later i was in his room again and noticed some mail on the floor with my name on but it was just junk from telcom so i was like MEH! but then i realised they were advertising a ...sweet deal... and so i put the pieces together and gave him the punnies for pillaging the delicious direct marketing tactics that were destined to be mine. a week or so later marama was emailling me and said oh man i need a new phone mine is sooo pants and then about an hour later some lady from telecom rung and told me if i went on a plan which would work out cheaper than my current one i'd get a free phone. and then could sell my old one or give it to a needy friend or whatevs. apparently i'd already been sent something in the mail about this ...sweet deal... but when i started ranting about how that had turned out she just launched into explaining terms and conditions. baiche. toodling the street a few days later i popped in a telecom store and got chatting with some guy there a sales rep fortunately. wound up going for a nice nokia instead of the freebie phone and was bitterly disappointed to learn that the ...sweet deal... plan didn't mean that jellybeans would be arriving in my letterbox on a regular basis although i would have to guard it like a hawk to ensure any reaching me safely. YES SIMON I'M LOOKING AT YOU!! got everything sussed out and signed off and hooked up except that i would have to come back in to get the contacts directory switched over from my old phone onto my nice new whizzy-bang phone.

except. um. slight problem. i appear to have mislaid aforementioned old phone.

and i have not yet transferred any of my numbers over. so yah.


i'm SURE it'll turn up. like my gloves, those ones i bought at galleries lafayette and was so gutted to lose and got my turquoise jazzercise hobo gloves to replace. they showed up again eventually! were under my armchair tucked under the bag of too-big clothes for the sallies actually. hmm. maybe i should look there.

in the meantime apologies if i act like a complete liability when you try and get in touch with me. for a change.

PS this is the first time i've posted on anything other than my (my!) iBook using Safari and shitballs A DEUX i can't BELIEVE all the options and doodackies going on... i have been using tags to do everything... this is phenomenal... its from the future.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

the kind of mail I love

I feel a ...moment... coming upon me each time I hear this song.

Postcards from Italy

And this is what its like when you see Beirut live apparently. Holy moley.


Saturday, October 07, 2006

True that

Fantastic painting from Banksy's recent "Barely Legal" exhibition in LA. This got a lot of press on account of the live elephant he painted as part of the artworks, but you may have heard of this British prankster before.

Just last month, Banksy wreaked havoc on the launch of Paris Hilton's album. 500 copies, in nearly 50 stores around the UK, were replaced with handmade hijacked versions. This included altered cover art with a topless Ms Hilton, retitled tracks such as 'What Am I For?' and 'Why Am I Famous?' and remixes by Danger Mouse. There's a great video here on YouTube showing the process.

He's also the guy who, a couple of years ago, simultaneously planted subverted artworks in four major art museums across America. And then managed to sneak a version of a cave painting (complete with shopping trolley) into the British Museum. It is now part of their permanent collection.

Banksy (yes it's a pseudonym, no the true identity is not known) got his start in graffiti art. His stencils are pretty damn incredible. Not to mention the murals he's done around England and the world. I like how he incorporates the features of the environment, like window frames and how so many seem to be life size. Main themes are anti-capitalist/anti-war kind of thing, very clever and subversive - not to mention funny. Joe? Davey? You gots to check the places he's bombed... "we're bored of fish" by the penguins at a zoo... awesome. A Google Images search is a good place to begin...

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strange corners of the blogosphere

I'm easily distracted at the best of times. So I often find myself hitting the "Next Blog>>" button up at the top of the page there, just for kicks. You are instantly transported into someone else's world. Sometimes it's devastingly mundane, or in a foreign language, or some kind of weird advertising site, sure. I remember Lou saying she always seems to hit the right-wing fundamentalist cheerleader types! But every now and again you strike gold.

I just stumbled across a woman who described herself as a "52 year old happily single mother of thirty-nine". I was sure it was a typo or something. But I scanned through a couple of her recent entries and, yup, it seems like she's an adoptive parent and does a lot of long-term fostering. There is one post in particular you should check out, Drugs. She's writing with such honesty and despair about the emotional/psychological state that the kids are in when they get to her, after being in 'care'.
Sergi blew his stack tonight when I walked off from a pending altercation with Jose. "Boy, what is WRONG with you?" Sergi bellowed.

"Let it go Sergi." I knew neither of us would get anywhere with Jose when he acts like that, a boulder would give more response and twice the animation.

...I'm finding, I'm hearing from many mothers how much tougher the kids are now coming out of foster care into adoption and I totally agree. The lack of empathy, little conscience development and an inordinate anger level all combine for some heartless children it seems at time. Is it the meth? Crack?

Am I actually longing, out loud, for the days of marijuana and heroin affected children versus today's vicious drugs of choice?

My perspective is becoming skewed after decades of this.

So amazing getting to have a first-person perspective of a situation like that, so far removed from my own. And yet the issues she's touching on are so relevant to NZ's society at the moment. The infiltration of drugs, the P epidemic that our media is so excited about, has far reaching and deep seated consequences. It's people like her that are really on the front line.

Also, I am very nosey and like getting to read people's diaries. Speshly famous people's. Even those famous for being famous. Here is Nicole Ritchie denying she was even dating that guy she supposedly just broke up with (it'll probably be in NZ Woman's Day in like six weeks) and here is Cory Kennedy, muse of Cobrasnake, whaa-ing on about people wearing tee-shirts with her name on.


won't you please put your hands together

The New York Times says that even monkeys understand the importance of holding hands. But it seems its fallen out of fashion with us humans.

They compare The Beatles' 1963 lyrics "When I'll feel that something/ I want to hold your hand" to 50 Cent's recent chart-topper 'In da Club': "I'm into havin' sex/ I ain't into makin' love". Times sure have changed. However, despite society's slack standards meaning that SMUT now runs rampant on the airwaves, apparantly hand-holding has managed to survive the sexual revolution.

But nowadays holding hands has a sheen of intimacy, rather than of innocence. Its not a 'first base' move, but instead something that comes later in a relationship. The article also quotes a professor who points out that face-to-face relationships are losing ground to those being conducted (at least partially) via various electronic media. We're missing out on vital moments to experience touch and interpret body language and build up that physical intimacy.

Now, you see I have this thing. I can last about nine hours total without coming into contact with anyone and then I will throw myself at the nearest person for a hug. I have pretty much zero personal space. I am the girl who who reached over and flicked your shirt tag back down under your collar last time you were in an elevator. I can barely have a conversation without involving a shoulder touch or knee pat or somesuch. I'm sure it infuriates some people and it has lead to some awkward misinterpretations, but its just the way I am really.

So it didn't surprise me at all to read the many professors quoted in the article, talking about how integral touch is to human development and to building relationships. One study showed that while having MRIs, the women who were allowed to have their spouse hold their hand, coped much better with negative emotions. [Actually, their sample size was too small for me to really validate it, but I do admire the sentiment. Props to Media Research 203 with Craig & Suzette for making me eternally vigilant.]

Heather & I actually had a conversation (electronic) about holding hands just last week. Specifically about what a significant step it is in a relationship (obv someone from NYT hacked in). She was telling me about first getting together with her boy and said something along the lines of "its wasn't official but we went for dinner and he held my hand" and I was all "OMG!! so official!".
And earlier this year, I was seen, by a workmate, holding hands in town with my brother - who assumed that he must've been a boyfriend. Because why would brother and sister hold hands? Not as embarrasing as the time my ex came into work and my boss thought he was my brother "because you two look so much alike!" but um yeah.

I've been listening to Death Cab For Cutie's Tiny Vessels over and over. Damn it is a gooood song.

Friday, October 06, 2006


...can eat my ass out like hungry bears" is a true true Hollywood story about the perils of the system. It's a long read, but worth it - and very entertaining. Of particular interest to those of you with scripts up your sleeves. Obviously things are run differently here, where we're pretty much dependent on government funding, not huge commercial payouts, but check it out anyhoo if you're so inclined.

Am also just going to scamper off and pop in those links for the post from the other day and comment on comments! Am concerned some slanderisation is going on!!

Have had two truly divine moments this week. Not like 'ooh I think I can sense God here somewhere' but actual big mud patties of spiritual tangibility shaped up and thrown at me. Messy but good for me. Actually that is quite a parallel metaphor but that tactileness of it express something.


Thursday, October 05, 2006

Your name is Susan Kuhnhausen.

You have worked another long shift at the hospital and are glad to be home. You barely notice that the house alarm has been deactivated. You are thinking about your long overdue dinner, about putting a saucepan on the stove, maybe cooking some eggs. There is mail to go through. A fashion catalogue, postcard from your sister, another letter from the lawyer.

The first noise you hear could be anything, you're not even sure it came from inside the house. The second time it is close and sinister. The next few seconds are somehow frantic and yet also frozen in time. You know you are being attacked and still a part of you refuses to believe it.
You are taken completely by surprised and the whole world jolts as a claw hammer cracks into your skull. There isn't enough time to be scared. The instinct inside takes over. Everything flows through you and out of you. You are not sure if its blood or tears on your face.

The man is on the ground. Your bodies are as close as lovers. You take your hands away from his neck. You are a nurse, you know the pallor of death when you see it. You go to your neighbours' house and there aren't enough words to explain what has happened. Somebody came to rob you and yet so much more has been stolen. They sit you down on the couch. Ice is pressed to your head.


The next day, the police call and say they need to talk to you again, that they have a few more questions. That there has been a development. A bag was found at your house, belonging to the dead man, with his day planner inside. They'd identified him as the janitor at an adult video shop. The same place where your ex-husband works. Well. Not your ex-husband yet. The divorce isn't final, due to his making things difficult. The police tell you the day planner has your husband's name and phone number on the week that you were attacked. And the dead man is an ex-crim with a previous record for conspiracy to commit murder. The police tell you that they will be making further investigations. That they expect to make an arrest.


Everybody wants to talk to you. Not just your friends and family, but those modern day vultures; the newspapers and TV shows and radio stations from all over the country and the world. But you have a conference to go to, more nursing work to do. You leave a message on your voicemail and get on with living your life:
"I'm not able to answer all the calls that I've received in the past few days. I'm being comforted by your concern and your support. I want you to know that our lives are all at risk for random acts, but more likely random acts of love will come your way than random acts of violence."



Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Shapeshifter with live orchestrizzle

Beforehand I was like "do I even like Shapeshifter? what songs do they sing, Sam?" for which I nearly got the smackdown but jokes aside, I hadn't yet heard any of their new album and was rather more looking forward to their warm up act, Ladi6.

She was fantastic, of course, accompanied by Parks on the decks, who did lots of singing too. Casually dressed, Ladi6 commented early on she was more used to a club setting. The Opera House was barely half full at this stage, with everyone firmly in their seats. But she visibly relaxed a couple of songs in and one of her last tracks will surely be a single from her debut solo album (due in April, so she said!). Intro-ing it with "Keeping it in the family, this is one I wrote with my cousin..." she launched into a funky song that was great hip hop but still very soulful too (what I like best about Ladi6). Of course it does help when your cousin is NZ's top hip hop artist AKA Scribe - they got their start together in a very cool group called Verse Two I think...?! I'm sure Sam Brown will correct me :P

yeah it sold out on the Monday FYIAnyhoo, then Shapeshifter were on. Woot.
Haha jokes! Their first half was performed with the Vector Wellington Orchestra. Two amazing live acts and it was incredible seeing them perform together. The Shapeshifter guys were all in ties and shirts too, which was very cute. Keeping up appearances! I would have loved to have seen more experimentation go on, though I guess they were on a limited time frame in terms of rehearsal. It just felt like none of their songs had been restructed to accomodate for these wonderfully talented funky classical musicians: you'd just be hearing a Shapeshifter song - yes, granted, a pretty damn exciting live version - but then there'd just be some strings going on in the background or whatever. I thought they'd at least do something like have a big symphonic opening and then go BOOM! and have a massive drop come in and bust out some crazy drum n bass stuff and fuse the two together...but... nah.
However the sold-out crowd was absolutely lovin it and i don't think a single person was sitting in their seat. Or if you were sitting, you could not sit still. From the bass vibrations if nothing else!! The second half was pure Shapeshifter and they brought out an MC called Electric Puha, a guy from Queenstown I think, who was just fantastic. Such great energy and a nice balance to P Diggss. (Also, they changed their outfits, into like, tee-shirts and caps and stuff. Well played). My favourite bit was when they did like a medley and sampled all sorts of tracks/lyrics - the obligatory FFD (he'd already done the shout-out to Dallas in the dress circle) and I got delirious when I heard them referencing the Roots -woot!!

My other favourite bit was bumping into this guy that I was sort of dating at the start of the year. It fizzled out for various reasons and the few times I have seen him round since he has studiously managed to avoid seeing me. However the last time we crossed paths, he was barrelling down Courtenay with a blonde in tow, their fingers entwined in a way that screamed coupledom. I was like "awwh" because I'd gotten the impression he was quite keen to suss something like that. And so then I saw him again at this gig as I arrived with Sam and finally I get a hullo out of him! And so I was telling Sam who he was (back story: he'd come to look at a spare room in our flat and I was like 'hmm you may be too cute to live here' ...I'd been left unsupervised to vet the new flatmates COMPLETE SHAMBLES) and Sam was all 'no morality' which he seems to say A LOT and then I was like 'oooh he so only said hi cause he thinks that I'm here with some boy and he's all awwh she found someone nice but actually UM NO just cause i didn't want to date you doesn't mean I've found someone else so HAH... yeah!!' and Sam was like 'you sure showed him'.

Ok I've just realised how insanely late it is and this may explain why I am writing so insanely. I also wanted to cover Hinepau, Coldcut and Toi Cabaret but perhaps not. One word summaries: Funny. Funky. Underdressed.
Also: Hinepau was in Upper Hutt and me and Melissa were cracking all these jokes on the way up and telling ourselves off for being such baiches and then the moment - literally the moment - we stepped out of the car, the first person that walked past, clearly a local, was not wearing shoes. I clutched my handbag closer to myself. Melissa tried to get back in the car and make a dash for it but I had an obligation to attend the performance and damn we were glad we did. One of the most entertaining shows I think I've ever seen - lucky kids having something like that aimed at them.

Will add some links tomorrow: [Taaah DAHH!!]
Shapeshifter Vector Wellington Orchestra Ladi6 Hinepau Coldcut Ninja Tune Toi Cabaret The Package [where I got that pic of Shapeshifter rockin the Opera House from]

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